Dear Parents of Today’s 2nd Graders,
You suck at being parents. If you don’t like the way your child behaves, then it’s up to you to change it. If there was ever a situation where you avoided doing something that should’ve been done because you didn’t want upset your child, then you’ve contributed to your child becoming a little shit.
Do you want to know how an 8 year-old learns to yell at people when they don’t get their way? From their parents. Either by watching them yell, or by learning that yelling is a way to get what they want.
You can’t blame electronics, the media, teachers, or peers. This is all your fault. How do I know? Because there are some decent kids. Not many, but some. And those kids have good parents that set boundaries, followed through on demands, and acted like adults in front of their children.
Children are products of their parents. I know this because whether I like to admit it or not, I’m a lot like my mother. Why? Because she’s my mother. She’s the one that taught me to work hard, to be polite in public, and to respect other people’s property.
If your kid acts out in public and is disrespectful at any time, it’s because you didn’t raise them right. You fucked up. But it’s not too late. It’s never too late to do the right thing. Step up and start parenting.
Begin my modeling the correct behavior. Be the person you want your child to be.
Have consequences for negative behaviors and tell them about it beforehand so it isn’t confused. And for fuck’s sake, follow through, damnitt!
If you tell your kids that if they don’t stop knocking into people on the playground that you’re going to go home, then you HAVE to go home if your kid knocks into anybody.
This is so crucial. How many times have you told your kid to stop doing something or you’re going to leave? And how many times has your kid done that exact thing and you put your hands up, like, “I don’t know what do do? Why didn’t my threat work? I always stopped when my parents threatened me.”
Your threat didn’t work because you don’t follow through on a previous threat. You behaved when you were a kid (or not, how should I know?) because you believed your parent was going to do something if you didn’t. All you have to do is start using your parental authority and your kid will respect that authority.
Here’s another huge problem. If you ever have given into your kid when it whines or cries then you just taught them that whining and crying works. You want your kid to stop whining or crying? Then only pay attention to them if they’re behaving the way you want them to.
How many times has an adult approached a crying, upset child with the attitude of, “Ooooo, what’s wrong? Do you want some candy? A toy? Will that make you feel better? Don’t be sad?” FUCK THAT ADULT! FUCK THAT ADULT RIGHT IN THE ASS! I FUCKING HATE THOSE PEOPLE!
Don’t ever approach a crying child by offering to make them feel better. Let them cry and when they’re done, maybe, you can talk to them about the correct way to get what they want.
Uh. I feel better. Hopefully the whole world reads this letter and the future generation won’t be completely fucked up.
–Second Grade Teacher